I used to love when my ex said that to me.....................in fact, I love when any man says that to me. It's been quite a long time since I've heard those words. I was thinking about this because of a "text" conversation I had with a good friend of mine yesterday.
We have been friends for almost 20 years. We were both married and divorced around the same times. Our exes were friends and both musicians. We travelled together and did a lot together. The guys did not keep in touch but we did and the rest is history.
We have been through a lot and really do have fun when we're together. Herein lies the issue. She is an only child. Both of her parents have passed. She does not have a close family and most of them do not live in the area. I am not an only child. I still have my mom. My family is close and we all live within 20 minutes of each other.
My family considers her a part of it. She has been at all of the major life events and has a celebrated many holidays with us. We are having a cookout at my uncle's today which will prove to have many laughs and great food!!
I called her yesterday morning to invite her. The first response I got was, "Can I be a maybe?" There were a few other things thrown in there but in the end she agreed. I was pretty stoked because she really doesn't like to commit until just before the event or whatever we're doing.
The work day is almost at its end when I get a text from her....she is going to pass on tomorrow. Nothing came up she's just in a really foul mood and doesn't want to do the happy family thing. I text back that I'm sorry to hear that and I'm disappointed because we were all looking forward to seeing her and catching up with her. She responds with a thanks much...don't really care about much though.
Now, don't get me wrong, I care about her very much and don't want to see her like this. Having said that, though, this is a constant issue with her. She is always in a foul mood and is very much isolating herself. She is constantly depressed and will not do anything about it. We have had numerous conversations about it. All to no avail.
We both have a lot of the same things in our lives -- a house, rental properties, cars, jobs, friends, no mate. Do I get lonely and sad sometimes because I don't have a mate....absolutely! Have I learned how to deal with that in a healthy manner? Yeppers. With her her it is a constant woe is me deal and, quite frankly, I'm tired of hearing it.
I have come to the conclusion that I can only do so much. I cannot be around constant negativity. I can only listen to someone whine and bitch for so long. (Yes, that is my job but at least my clients have recognized the importance of counseling). I so badly want to tell her, yet again, that this is not healthy and that she really needs to do something about it.
That won't happen because she'll get mad and won't speak to me for a long time.....been there done that routine.
In the meantime, I'll be patient and pray that she gets what she needs to help her with this. I will also pray that she finds some happiness in her life. I could not imagine living without happiness.
Good morning, Sunshine! It's a beautiful day. Rejoice and be glad in it!
2 comments:
Morning to you sunshine - not much sun Down Under though - bllody floods ATM! Hope that it is sunny where you are!
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